Sunday, October 13, 2013

Could it be that sun of the beach?

I wonder if that sun of the beach has anything to do with it. Stopped going to beach 2 weeks ago after beaching 2x/3x a week in the summer. Did it suppressed my flare? If I continue beaching, will I ever get another flare? The sun did stop my areolas from oozing. Writing is hard for me, here are some pictures.

Yes it is itchy as hell! Can't I sit up straight, as the folds under my breasts gets sweaty and makes me itch :(

Close up left breast, red dots filled with fluid are equally distributed on both breasts

Chills started 2 nights ago followed by chunks of hair falling out. This is surely TSW, eczema does not give you the chills, joint pain or hair loss. The longer I am going through with it, the surer I am. Nothing works during TSW. Not for me at least, no lotions, not even the coconut oil I been using all this while. Yesterday a dear friend help purchased Neem powder, but unfortunately is not pure. It felt good when I first applied it, cause it has a minty effect. It seems to calm the redness but once I washed it off, the dots are filled with fluid again and it itches.

Lesson learnt! Won't spend money on anything this time around. Nothing works besides dead sea salt baths and apple cider vinegar! Trust our body has the ability to heal itself!

Friday, October 11, 2013

Watch your thoughts.

I have been so proud of how I healed before my 1 year anniversary off roids. I posted on Facebook bragging this can be done in less than a year and gave tips on how I get over it so QUICKLY. I also planned what I should do and where I should live to avoid the cold weather approaching. I was so positive that my skin is feeling so normal that another flare is NEVER EVER coming back.

Is it true that what you think is what you become? Well every time I think for the best, it just doesn't seem to go that way. This is my 3rd flare after 3 months break. I feel defeated before this battle even begins. My mood is off the chart being a cry baby and a bitch. I had to start all over explaining my condition to friends and convinced them this is still part of TSW even I had 3rd doubt about it.  Well I doubt it the 2nd time during my 2nd flare.
How is this even possible after everything was so normal and the next day, it felt like the outer layer of your skin is stripped away and leave me so sensitive to any physical contact including the softest cotton that I been wearing all these time?

My breasts are back oozing and dripping with yellow fluid and my entire chest area and around my breasts are covered with combination of welts and tiny pimply dots. The pimply itchy dots are filled with colorless fluid. When they burst after scratching, you feel the hardened "millet seeds".

This has spread to my fold of my right arm, behind my right knee, scalp and my face in the past 2 days. My right elbow is hurting from what feels like arthritis.

Tell me how should I watch my thoughts when I am strongly believe I was getting better and this NEVER ever can happen? I am resentful towards people that preach what you think is what you become. They know what I went through and how positive I was the last 3 months and how I progressed and now this is my fault because my thoughts manifested to make this flare happen.

Back of my right knee, picture don't do justice how I feel